"Silent Crusade"
from Two Sides to Every Story (1977);
also available on 2-CD Flying High compilation
from Two Sides to Every Story (1977);
also available on 2-CD Flying High compilation
written by Gene Clark
I am told that my life is a clipper
The sea of time has tossed about
And I know that there's only one skipper
Who can guide that ship about
Do the wakening eyes of the wondering soul
See within and then without?
Silently the truth speaks more loudly
Than what falls from my mouth
Seems my dreams are the wings of a spirit
This vessel’s sails can't fill without
From its wind comes the light of inspiration
And the darkness of doubt
Gales of anger that wane into the calm
Please take me drifting far away
From the wordy and worldly explanation
Of this space we call today.
Sail away
Sail away from the shore.
Situations, weigh the anchor once more.
Sail away
Sail away from the shore.
Situations, weigh the anchor once more.
1977's Two Sides To Every Story appeared three years after the commercial failure of Gene’s grand artistic statement, No Other. In a perfect world, Two Sides would have been welcomed as a triumphant follow-up to its ambitious, critically acclaimed predecessor, and serve to galvanize Clark’s status as a songwriting force to be reckoned with, ultimately catapulting Gene into the forefront of 1970's singer-songwriters, and overdue superstardom.
Alas, it was not to be. Two Sides To Every Story sold poorly and was slammed as "plodding," "lame," and "lugubrious to the point of laughableness" by Paul Nelson in Rolling Stone (RS 239).
It was also Gene’s final album for a major label (RSO).
So what happened with Two Sides? There are no shortage of possible explanations, but here’s my take on it. Thomas Jefferson Kaye’s production--so crucial to the Spectoresque bombast and breadth of No Other--was, on this occasion, flaccid, lacking spirit, grit or vision, unable to coax anything resembling energetic performances out of the assemblage of musicians. The ill-chosen rock tracks, "Mary Lou" and the inexplicable remake of "Kansas City Southern", did not rock, and in fact sounded like a very average pub band playing to an empty house on a Tuesday night. The more laid-back tracks, like "Hear the Wind," seemed sluggish, bogged down in what I would characterize as late-‘70's burnout. I still maintain the position that if this song had been performed in more sprightly arrangement, in, say, the style of Neil Young’s early ‘70's hits like "Old Man" and "Heart of Gold," it would have been a breakthrough hit for Gene.
The failure of No Other must have devastated Gene. He wrote or co-wrote the entire album, with the exception of one song which was co-written with Doug Dillard. It’s my theory that in the period after the failure of No Other Gene suffered a crisis of self-confidence which left him doubting the value of his own writing and, by extension, his own value as a person. Why else would he ditch impressive songs like "Wheel of Time, "Denver or Wherever" and "The Daylight Line" in favour of recording three covers, only one of which succeeded ("Give My Love to Marie")? "Wheel," "Denver," and "Daylight" were superior to any of the covers and the majority of Clark originals on the finished album. I’m unsure if "Crazy Ladies" was written prior to the recording of Two Sides, but if it had been, this would be a further evidence that Gene had simply lost the ability to objectively gauge the value of his songwriting skills.
"Silent Crusade," for those who toughed it out and continued listening as Two Sides limped to its finish, provided a possible explanation for what was happening with Gene in the post-No Other period. One of the recurring metaphors in Gene’s writing is the sea. Here, Gene likens himself to a ship tossed about on the sea of time. If one remembers that since he left the Byrds in early 1966 Gene had been recording and performing sporadically as a solo artist and had failed to log even one commercially successful album (or single, for that matter), this image is quite apt.
Part of Gene’s genius as a lyricist was his ability to convey abstruse concepts in a just a few words, epitomized in a line like, "Do the wakening eyes of wandering soul see within and then without?" Posed as a question, Clark accurately conveys the "darkness of doubt" to which he will shortly allude-- the inference being he should be able to look within his soul with the same clarity that his eyes apprehend the world around him. It is common knowledge that Gene’s drinking and drug use escalated during the 1970's--after all, what musician’s intake did not?--but his lyrics hint at something uglier: addiction.
"Silently the truth speaks more loudly than what falls from my mouth" is a line which fascinates me. I think it’s an reference to the kind of delusional games that substance abusers play with themselves. Gene finds that there is a disconnect between the honesty going on within him, the concern that his drinking might very well be a serious issue (he may have even been told this by concerned friends and family members: "I am told that my life is a clipper...")–-and the actual words which he speaks, perhaps in denial of these same concerns.
The inner voice recognizes both the "light of inspiration" which obviously serves to fuel his songwriting, as well as its dreaded opposite, the "darkness of doubt", which I take to be an allusion to writer’s block possibly exacerbated by alcohol use.
But where is the calm in all of this? Where is the sense of inner peace and contentment? The wind propels the ship into waters where the light is conducive to writing, or headlong into "gales of anger."
There seems to be only feverish work or chronic desperation to choose from.
These are the two sides to the story.
Clark’s awareness of the need for inner peace leads to the crux of the song. He pleads for "this vessel"–his soul, to be taken to seas of calm, seas which transcend "worldly explanation." This desire is initially posed in the guise of a weary supplicant, but immediately becomes a direct command–a silent crusade--inside himself: "Sail away from the shore."
The heartbreaking final image, "Situations weigh the anchor once more," constitutes a denial of the hoped-for deliverance, and an ominous indication of how deeply the self-doubt (and quite possibly addiction) ran in Gene during this time. The use of the word "situations" is obviously a euphemistic catch-all phrase for all of his problems, from his disintegrating marriage to his slumping career, to his ever-growing abuse of booze.
"Silent Crusade" documents a quest for self-awareness and self-reliance growing impotent under the tightening grip of addiction.
